Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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