I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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