Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
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