Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Randomize
