I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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