I just made out with a guy for $7.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
