no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Randomize
