How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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