i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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