the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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