dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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