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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I just saw the nastiest chick.

  (1-603): View more from New Hampshire

  Where?

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you

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• (914): View more from New York

  Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.

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• (408): View more from California

  You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.

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• (831): View more from California

  I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  Why am I wearing a dog collar

  (1-336): View more from North Carolina

  Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  Your cat ate my taco.

  (480): View more from Arizona

  . . . I don't have a cat?

  (602): View more from Arizona

  It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead

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• (252): View more from North Carolina

  What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside

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