I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize