Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
