Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
