I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
