I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
My first STD was from a foam party
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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