Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
