Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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