You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize