HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Randomize
