Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
