can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
