I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
