I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Randomize
