i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
barbara walters just said penis...
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
