yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
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