You're so nebulous sometimes
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
