At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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