Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
