Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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