no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
