well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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