What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
It was like giving head to a cactus.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
