I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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