hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I would ride that face into the sunset
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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