Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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