I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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