I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
