we have pet lesbian snakes
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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