Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
