i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
