Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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