Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
