Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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