I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
