yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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