We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
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