also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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