OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
